And so it begins

You know, I tried this once with another website. Needless to say, I rarely found the time to update it. We'll see what happens this time around.

I started this blog to give me a place to externalize my internal thoughts and feelings. Sounds smart doesn't it? Don't get used to it. I also started this blog to help me cope with, ah forget it. You can read the title and description, right?

A sample: In the 30 minutes since I decided to create my new online outlet, my 9 week old daughter woke up (from a too short nap, if you ask me), ate, spit up, had two diaper changes, went back to sleep, woke up and wanted her paci, went back to sleep, had another diaper change, and is now playing by staring up at the ceiling and vocalizing. And she is my second child. My first child is at daycare, where she is now the tallest child there, she is probably not sleeping even though it is naptime, she probably ate only 1/4 of her lunch, which means she will come home and instantly begin with "I'm starving, when is dinner, can I have another snack, but I'm hungry..." etc. She is almost 5.

Our house looks like the title of my blog: A pack of howler monkeys on crack have invaded. We installed new carpet 3 months ago. Anyone ever do that? With kids? We were smart and bought Stainmaster brand, however, as we found out, when you install new carpet, you are perpetually cleaning up the little fiber balls created by rampaging children (and normal everyday walking) as the new carpet is "broken in". Add to this, the fact that my 5 year old has 30 million small toys that have to be played with in the living room everyday, in addition to the infant swing, kick-in-play, tummy-time mat, car seat, 62,000 diapers and 4 million wipes, clean clothes on the couch, and various assorted items such as furniture, TV, and pictures, our living room looks like...well, you can imagine.

The rest of the house is not much better. In fact, the biggest guest bathroom is the one I am currently remodeling. And by the way, whoever invented particle board baseboards as well as the person stupid enough to install them in a BATHROOM, should burn in a very hot place for all eternity. What a nightmare to take up. Anyway, the remodeling is taking place 15 minutes here, 30 minutes there. You know, I got in there for an hour two days ago. So far I have managed to take up all but three base boards, scrape and clean the wall, and take down the curtains and blinds. Sometime next year, that bathroom may be usable again.

Back to the kids. My oldest girl is nearly 5. When she was born, she would curl her toes around anyone's finger that got near her foot. That along with the fact she was 2 weeks late and she backed up and hung onto my clavicle with her feet during labor (the doctor had to literally take the vacuum cup and pull her out), she is nicknamed "Monkey". Ah, you see. My second daughter was born 9 weeks ago (again, she was late--only four days this time), again with the vacuum. Stubborn aren't they? Before the new baby was born, we wanted Monkey to connect with her. So we let her give the nickname. "Squirrel". Okay, two furry animals that can climb trees and create havoc. Those are my kids. Monkey was a very calm baby, who then turned into a normal, hyper toddler, as is now a normal, hyper preschooler. Squirrel is a reflux baby, who had made it her mission in life to win the world record for the farthest projectile spit-up, as well as the most changes of clothes in one day. We have long since stopped putting her clean clothes in her dresser. We just wash and dry them and keep them in the laundry basket, ready for quick grabs. We have also learned to "nascar" her bibs. Monkey, DH, and I resemble a pit crew at a moments notice, with bibs, wipes, burp cloths, and clean clothes. Hmm, I wonder how much the average pit crew person's salary is... Never mind. I have also learned that when leaving the house for an hour, four bibs, four burp cloths, four clean onsies, and a full complement of diapers and wipes (not to mention a clean shirt for me) barely fit into her diaper bag...and unfortunately, are most times still not enough to make the trip. When are manufacturers going to realize the only diaper bag worth making is a "bag of holding". If you don't know what that is, then you are not a geek.

Now, DH. You didn't think I was not going to mention him, did you? This is the man whom I dearly love, and most often want to divorce. He grew up with parents who managed to keep a small pocket of time frozen to 1952 in their house. But that's not the point. The main point here lately is his lack of desire to interact with our newborn. In his words, "She is so different from Monkey. I will stick to the one I know." Will Squirrel eventually realize that Daddy doesn't play with her? He changes diapers, clothes, bibs, etc. He holds her when I need a break. But he doesn't seek her out to play with her. I think she will notice (if she doesn't already) and how can she possibly feel cherished and loved by her daddy, when his interaction with her is "all business"? That breaks my heart. I took Monkey out the other day for 2 hours to go to WalMart and left Squirrel home with DH. When I got back, he had her in her carseat carrier, next to the recliner in the living room while he played an online computer game. So, he basically ignored her except to give her back her paci, or jiggle her carrier when she cried. No argument (and there have been many) has managed to sway his level of thinking on the subject. He is also, in my opinion, addicted to this game. Even though (and I hear it quite often) he doesn't play as much as he used to, the game is always there, taking up his interest and thoughts. How will I explain to Squirrel that her daddy is more interested in that game than in playing with her? His defense (and you knew there would be one) is that he plays with Monkey. So, dear child, will you think your daddy loves your older sister more than you? I am fighting like mad to get him to acknowledge my views on this subject.

So now you know why I created this blog.